The Cupcake in Question, Vincent Gallo and A Cold Case

If you've ever seen Vincent Gallo's Buffalo '66 you'll certainly remember the scene at the beginning where Billy Brown is searching for a bathroom. One of the restrooms is closed. He is refused use of another and finally after not finding a bathroom for eternity and eternity he finds a tree to pee behind. This is the greatest relief ever. Billy looks at the camera a few minutes after peeing, inhales deeply, and breathes a huge sigh of relief that comes out as "whhhoooo . . . whhhooo." Well, I had a huge cupcake today. See the pictures above? I mean there is a cupcake under all that icing. After I ate most of the thing I found myself pulling a Billy Brown. "Whhhooo . . . whhhooo." Not only this but I was watching the television show "Cold Case Files," a show which is enough to make you feel guilty for crimes you haven't even imagined. I usually don't watch this show but I love crime shows like "American Justice" and "Snapped." What pulled me into this episode of Cold Case Files was a story about a crime that was commited by an apparently religious man. OK, so give me a crime show and then make the killer an extremely devout, right-wing religous man who preaches 10 hours to the police taking him back to Florida while he's eating some Fig Newtons and you've got me totally hooked. The show compared this case to the story of Cain and Abel. I'm fascinated by anything like this, so I kept watching. James Drysdale was a drifter who murdered a wealthier man, named Jim McCutcheon, who took him in. While Jim had more money than James, they lived in a shack with very little near an orange grove in Florida. After an argument James Drysdale shot Jim McCutcheon and then dragged him into the orange grove and buried him. Whhhooo. Whhhoo. So not only do I have the weight of this cupcake but I have the weight of a murder and Cain and Abel rolling through my head and then the wrath of God hovering over me. James Drysdale was captured after leaving the state and on his way back to Florida began preaching, eventually sermonizing on the Day of Judgement. One of the detectives believes that giving James some Fig Newtons to eat may have relaxed him enough so that he preached and then confessed, cracking the case . . . . Maybe I should have had a Fig Newton.