Twenty-Two Random Thoughts on Certain Days

Rolly and Me

1. that the visible cutting scars on my chest aren't that bad
2. that the cutting scars on my arms are no longer visible
3. that invisible cutting scars represent hope
4. that I wish I'd never cut in the first place
5. that I hope I don't cut again
6. that it's OK that I've cut
7. that one day I'll feel whole and beautiful
8. that, the other night, I thought my body was beautiful
9. that I'm not emotionally compromised
10. that everyone is emotionally compromised
11. that, in a fleeting moment, my interior existence meshes with my exterior existence and I feel peace
12. that, sometimes, my thoughts and emotions mesh and I know what it means to feel whole
    
13. that emotional pain has been ordained to make me stronger
14. that I'm tired of emotional pain
15. that I want a dessert buffet at my funeral
16. that heartbreak isn't that bad
17. that heartbreak is worse than death
18. that, perhaps, by some slim chance, Claus von Bülow didn't kill his wife
19. that artist Francis Bacon found love
20. that I love jumpy castles
21. that there are tiny cats with wings who dive-bomb people
22. that I need a designer wardrobe, especially a gown